I Am Not A Forest Ranger

'I am not a forest ranger, an expert, or a guide,

I’m just a woman, who likes to camp outside,

I try to learn what it is I have to know,

And by no means here, consider me a Pro...'


Be alert and make noise as you wander through the forest...

I Am Not a Forest Ranger


I am not a forest ranger, an expert, or a guide,

I’m just a woman, who likes to camp outside,

I try to learn what it is I have to know,

And by no means here, consider me a Pro.


I read the notices and watch the videos, too,

To learn what it is I have to know and do,

If I’m out in the wilds in my lake forest place,

And if I end up being with a wild animal face to face.


At my lake and on my forest land here,

I could run into a cougar, bear or deer,

I’m not so worried about a Bambi near me,

But the cougars and bears make me nervous, you see.


Now don’t get me wrong, they are rarely seen here,

And I’ve only seen a bear once in all my years,

A cougar was spotted for a moment as a child,

As my brother and I were walking out in the wild.


But evidence is around that animals live in my woods,

The bear scat you see shows evidence of their foods,

And footprints in mud have shown evidence of a cat,

I should then be aware that a cougar could attack.


So, there is a couple of things I need to know,

Before I head out into the forest and go,

Always make noise to startle a bear,

And if facing one do not look into its eyes and stare.


Try to look big, and never climb a tree or turn and run,

For surely that is the way that you’ll end up done,

A black bear really doesn’t want to tangle with you,

Unless he is really hungry, he’d rather run off and shoo.


There’s times when you just have to lie face down and ‘play dead’,

On the ground, spread your legs, and place hands behind your head,

A backpack on your body is also some protection for you,

But I can tell you praying, is another thing I would do.


As for a cougar, and not like the bear,

You certainly want to give the cat’s eyes a hard stare,

But you must also not run, and should make yourself look big,

Never crouch down and look smaller or you’re done like guinea pig.


When all else fails and you are under attack,

You just have to give it your all and really fight back,

Go for a cougar’s throat and go for it’s head,

Use a knife, a stick, or wield a sharp rock instead.


It’s best to respect the wildlife out there,

Getting close for a photo is like putting out a dare,

A wild animal might not like the closeness of you,

Antagonize an animal and an attack might ensue.


You want to share the forest with the wildlife who lives there,

You have to respect that there are cougars and bears,

You want to enjoy the forest beauty and green spaces,

Without putting a stressed animal through its paces.


You want to walk, hike and enjoy the beauty outside,

So make noise as you go so animals would rather hide,

You want to be out there safe and having your fun,

Enjoying all Nature has to offer under the warmth of the sun.


by ladyofthelakebc

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